


Actions speak louder than words

by Zsadistwhore



Category: Queer as Folk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-18
Updated: 2012-08-18
Packaged: 2013-07-10 00:48:13
Rating: T
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,954
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/8441462/1/
Author URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/u/2008683/Zsadistwhore
Summary: What if Justin found out about all those hidden moments which shows how Brian actually feels about him? T for language, more than anything. Could possibly be K .





	Actions speak louder than words

**A/N: A while back, I read Pieces of the Puzzle by Violette7. This inspired a dream where I was showing Justin a video clip of all various moments in the first two season which Brian shows how much he cares about Justin.**

**As I strongly believe that Justin would have stayed with Brian and not run off with Ethan had he known, I decided to write it.**

**There are other moments, but I decided to pick just a few (i.e. the ones I could remember without having to re-watch the entire two seasons again).  
**

**This is my second QAF story and the second time I have written in a couple of years, so please be nice. I live for criticism, but only when it's constructive. Else how am I going to know how to improve? Also, it hasn't been beta-ed, so any glaringly obvious mistakes are mine and mine alone.  
**

**I know the ending kinda sucks, but I wasn't really sure how to end it, so I do apologise in advance for that and any other bits that aren't all that good.  
**

**And I don't own QAF. If I did, things would have been a lot different.**

**One last thing, I am English, so I again apologise if the odd English word gets included. And everything not taken directly from QAF is written how I speak/think, which explains the lack of proper characterisation and disjointed use of tenses. My mind is a disorganised mess. Maybe one day I'll re-write this, taking more than half an hour, and get everything to flow better.  
**

**Here goes nothing. Enjoy. :)  
**

(This is set after the disastrous floor picnic but before Justin sleeps with Ethan for the first time. Not quite sure of the actual time line, but I'm imagining there were a couple of days in between each event. Justin has come to the loft to try to talk to Brian.)

"Brian? Are you here? Brian…?" Justin cautiously opened the loft door the rest of the way. Brian never leaves the door unlocked, never mind open. Justin learned that the hard way, after the whole loft getting robbed/running away to New York thing. "Brian?" Justin called again, expecting to find him either in bed or in the bathroom after having thrown a trick out. Both were empty.

Getting slightly nervous now, Justin headed towards the kitchen, and the phone. Just as he was about to ring Brian's number, the television switched itself on, with Brian and Michael appearing on the screen. "Brian, this isn't funny. Cut it out" Once again, no response. Releasing that Michael was talking, Justin turned his attention back to the screen.

"I am not babysitting him again. This time he's all yours."

Brian turns to look at Michael. "What?"

"He's over there talking to my mother, the little prick."

"Leave him alone. He's alright."

Michael looked at Brian with disbelief. "Excuse me; the noise in here is so loud I thought I heard you say he's alright"

"In fact, he's kinda sweet"

"Sweet? I thought we got rid of him. I thought he was out of our lives"

The screen suddenly went blank. All Justin could do was stare, confused. Before he could fully process any of the thoughts running though his head, another image appeared on the screen. This time it was him, with what looked like a trick in the backroom of Babylon. The image changed to that of Brian looking on, with something akin to jealously in his eyes. The screen Justin is oblivious to Brian watching them and continues to fuck his trick.

"What the fuck?" Justin breathes out loud.

Once again the image changes. Brian is wearing what looks like a tux, with a blood soaked white scarf around his neck and tear tracks on his face. Michael comes to sit next to him, putting an arm around his shoulders. Brian remains motionless, simply staring off into the distance.

Next image. Brain stood outside a hospital room, _his _hospital room. There's a nurse talking to him, wittering on about soup and smoking not being aloud in hospitals. Justin ignores this, focusing on Brain watching him sleep. His mom's voice replaces the nurse's and Justin tunes back in.

"The day the doctor sent him home from the hospital, he said he's never seen such a determined patient and he asked me what it was that made him work so hard. I knew, but I didn't tell him. It was you. Every day that you didn't come to see him was more incentive for him to get better and get out, so that he could come see you. Course, what Justin didn't know and I didn't tell him was that you were there, every night. The nurse on duty told me. I want to thank you for that, but he's home now, save and sound, so there isn't any reason anymore for you to watch over him, so. So I would like you to leave and never see him again."

"I care about him." Brian's voice responded.

"It was because of you he was almost killed. Forgive me for being so blunt. I've tried to accept him for who he is, to accept your world and that he's a part of it, I've even tried to accept you, and as a result I nearly lost him. And I don't intend to lose him again. So if you care about him. And I believe yo-, I believe you do, you'll do what I ask and return my son to me."

Brian is at a newspaper stand(*). He picks up a bouquet of roses. He smells them, looks like he's contemplating buying them, but ultimately puts them back, leaving empty handed.

The loft, empty, appears. The door opens and Brian walks in, carrying a bag and a bottle of champagne. "Hey Sunshine", as he's shutting the door, "come congratulate me. Your partner just made Partner." No response. Cut to the steps leading to Babylon. Brian walks up to the gang. There's some small talk before Brian asks "Where's Justin?"

"He's not here." Emmett replied.

"Where is he? I've got big news."

"We went to Vermont" supplied Michael.

"Snowboarding" Emmett helpfully added.

"Alone?"

"Alone" confirmed Michael.

"So, what's the big news?" Ted asked.

"Nothing" replied Brian, walking away.

Justin sank onto the couch in stunned shock. He thought it had finished, but one last sentence filtered out of the speakers.

"Listen to me. Listen to me. Are you listening? The night Justin was bashed and I called you and you were about to get on a plane and you came here and you sat with me for three days waiting to see if he was going to live or die."

Justin was still sat on the couch an hour later, when the phone rang.

"Brian?" came Michael's voice through the phone.

"No, Justin. Brian's still at work" Justin didn't really want to talk to Michael, but then a thought popped into his head.

"Well, tell him to ring me once he gets home." Michael was about to hang up the phone.

"Michael, wait. I want to ask you something."

"What?" Michael still didn't really like Justin and didn't feel like having a conversation.

"What's the real reason Brian didn't come to Vermont with me and ran off to Chicago instead?"

"I don't know" stammered Michael, confused by the question.

"Bullshit. Brian tells you everything. Why?"

A sigh followed a short pause then, "Ryder had just been taken over by Gardener Vance"

"I know that"

"Will you let me finish? Vance threatened to fire Brian and gave him a week to come up with a reason why he shouldn't. Brian had to go to Chicago to win the Brown's Athletic account; else he would have been fired."

"He didn't tell me that"

"Why would he? It's not like you're together-"

Not wanting to hear Michael jealously flaring up again, Justin hung up.

Justin heard the whirl of the elevator and the loft door sliding open.

"Why didn't you tell me?

"Tell you what?" confusion was evident in Brian's voice.

"The real reason you went to Chicago, that you waited at the hospital to see if I was going to be okay, that you came to see me EVERY SINGLE FUCKING NIGHT I WAS IN HOSPITAL" Justin was screaming at the end.

"I don't know what you're talking about" Brian tried to act nonchalant, but didn't quite manage it.

"Bullshit. You know exactly what I'm talking about. But typical Brian, can't admit to actually having anything even remotely resembling feelings." Justin takes deep breath, trying to prepare himself for what he's about to say. "You know what? Forget it. Forget everything. I met a guy who wants to me with me, just me. Nobody else. He wants to say in, not go out to Babylon every night. Who can admit to making love and not pretend it's just fucking. So if you can't admit to something I know is true, something which I know proves your feelings for me, why would I bother staying? You're never going to change, never going to tell me you love me. And I want that. I want someone who tells me how they feel about me, who doesn't have to hide behind a mask."

Justin grabs his bag and walks towards the door, hoping against hope that his plan will work. He doesn't want to be with Ethan, not really. Sure, it sounds great in theory, but Justin likes Brian the way he is. He just wishes that he would acknowledge that they are in a relationship and that Brian does actually like him.

Justin has opened the door, pausing slightly before starting to walk through it. He'd barely made it a step, when Brian grabs him, pulling him flush against his chest. He wraps his arms around Justin's chest, holding him in place, facing away from him.

"It's true" he whispers into Justin's ear, "It's all true. And just because I don't say it, maybe won't ever say it, it doesn't mean it isn't true."

That's all Justin needs to hear. All he needs to hear to forget that Ethan exists and that he was planning on sleeping with him. Brian starts to say something else, but Justin stops him, not needing any more words. He turns in Brian's arms and kissed him. With a smile firmly fixed on his face, Justin asks "So, Babylon tonight?"

**A/N *I think it's called a newspaper stand. We don't really have them in England, so I'm not sure. In case anyone is confused, it's the Justin/Ben's birthday episode, the last scene. Also, I know that Brian has a conversation with the guy, but as I have no idea what he would be called, I decided to exclude the dialogue, as I can do that. That's also the reason some of the scenes aren't quite written the way they are in QAF, as it was easier for me that way. **

**Reviews or just pointers on how to improve are much appreciated and give me the confidence to actually write.  
**

**Thank you to everyone so far who has reviewed and said such nice things. :)  
**


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