


A Race Against Time

by endlesscompassion



Category: Queer as Folk
Genre: Angst, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2010-07-08
Updated: 2013-11-10
Packaged: 2014-02-21 23:35:28
Rating: M
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,622
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/6123520/1/
Author URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/u/2269446/endlesscompassion
Summary: I always hated the reason why Justin left Brian so i made one of my own up. What if Ethan had threatened Just in with the person he loved the most? Rated M for language and violence





	1. Chapter 1

I don't own Queer as Folk sad to say.

Justin walked down the street in pain and feeling dizzy. It was a constant feeling since he had moved out of the loft. Ethan had stopped him from taking his meds. That meant that on top of his allergies, he had the extreme pain in his hand and head from the bashing. He turned the corner that led him to liberty diner and entered to start his shift. He froze in his tracks when he saw that everyone was there. Michael gave him a dirty look and turned his back on him. Emmett smiled at him and so did Ted. Brian just ignored him. Ouch. Deb gave him a bone crushing hug and it took everything in him not to cry out in pain. He managed that, but he hadn't managed to keep his face completely blank. Emmett had seen his facial expression and his eyes held concern and confusion.

Justin got on with his shift, not talking to anyone only to take their order. He hated the situation that he was in and it left him with a heavy heart. Brian was not dealing with his departure very well and Justin knew that. Unfortunately Ethan had found out that Justin knew that, so Justin knew that tonight's beating would be so much worse, Ethan had wielded a knife at him that morning. He decided to write a goodbye note and leave it somewhere noticeable ish. After he had done that, he thought back to happier times. When Justin had been with Brian, he had been so confident, now he bowed his head whenever someone looked at him. After his shift had ended he left the diner feeling so much worse than when he came in. He was dying; he could feel it, feel his life force slowly ebb away from him. He knew that he would not survive what tonight had in store for him. His only regret was that Brian didn't know how much he loved him, and that thought made the tears that had been gathering in the corner of his eyes fall freely down his gaunt cheeks.

BPOV

Justin walked in to do his shift and I froze. I didn't want to look at the face that had made me so happy and now so broken. I couldn't even trick anymore, my body refused to let me have the release I so desperately wanted, but then, life refused to let me have the person I so desperately _needed_. Why didn't I tell him that I loved him when I had the chance? I let him slip away from me and I was the worst thing I have ever done in my life. I watched him secretly and noticed that he looked like shit. Maybe the fiddler wasn't everything that he hoped to be. I hoped so, and then maybe he would come back to me. God I miss him so much... and to make matters worse I have turned into a lesbian!

Sunshine was walking stiffly and his breathing was shallow. I looked around to see if anyone had noticed it and saw that Emmett had a frown on his face whilst looking at Sunshine. I turned back around and saw him walk off with a piece of paper in his hand.

After his shift had finished, he took one last glance at us and saw the death glare that Mikey gave him. He looked in pain and close to tears. It made my heart clench. I wasn't supposed to care though, he wasn't with me anymore, and he was Ian's responsibility. And that fact hurt more than anything else.

"Hey guys, anyone notice anything wrong with Sunshine?" Debbie asked

To my surprise, everyone nodded, even Mikey. We all looked on with an expression of worry on our faces. Maybe life in paradise wasn't so perfect after all.

MPOV

I hate the little twink with everything in me for what he did to Brian, but I love him with the same intensity for the fact that he is my brother. I also felt a little guilty; I had told him that since he wasn't with Brian anymore, he should just stay out of all of our lives. My thoughts were broken by my mom coming out of the kitchen with a letter in her hands; she had gone white and was shaking.

"Ma, what's wrong?" I questioned her. She just held the letter out for me to read aloud.

Dear everyone who used to care about me,

I have something that I need to tell you before I leave. First of all I love you all, especially Brian. I have never loved anyone as much as I do him. Second, I fear that I will be dead soon. I am dying anyway but I'm sure that Ethan will make my time come faster than I expected. You see, when I left Brian at the party, and went with Ethan, he was standing behind Brian with a gun pointing at his back, having told me beforehand that if I didn't leave Brian for him, than he would shoot Brian in the crowd. I'm so sorry but I couldn't let that happen, so I went with him.

When we got "home" Ethan ripped off my clothes and filmed himself raping me. The tapes are in the top left drawer of the filing cabinet. Please make sure that he is convicted because it wasn't just me who was his victims. I have been getting beatings as a nightly occurrence and now I am dying, I can feel myself get weaker everyday as Ethan has also stopped me from taking my medication, all of it. I'm so sorry and I hope you can forgive me, please try to remember me as I was, not what I had become. Though, I can see that none of you love me anymore, which puts my mind at rest because then no one goes through any pain when I do die. I'm sorry that I let you all down and please, no matter what you feel towards me, could you all look after my mom and Molly?

I'll love you all forever

Your ray of Sunshine

I finished the letter and I felt the tears running down my face. I had called him the most selfish prick to exist when I found out. My brother was dying; I was going to lose him. Then I looked at Brian, and wished that I hadn't. He was shaking and white as a sheet, but what disturbed me more were the huge tears that were falling down his face. I looked around and that was the state of everyone who had heard the last words of the kindest boy – no man ever to exist. Emmett was sobbing into Ted's shoulder and Ted was trying desperately to hold himself together. Ben stood up and wrapped his arms around me. The tears that leaked down his face mingled with my own. I had never felt so guilty in my life. He had made the ultimate sacrifice in order to keep Brian safe and we had done nothing but be horrible to him. Even Hunter was in tears. He stood up and wrapped his arms around me and Brian. I stroked his hair whilst trying to stay strong for the rest of them

HPOV

Oh my God, I loved Justin so fucking much, he was my role model and now some son of a Bitch was going to take him from his family. I stood up and hugged Michael I cried that it wasn't fair and he shushed me. I looked across at Brian and he looked devastated. I made my mind up then that we were going to save Sunshine. I unwrapped myself from my surrogate father and went over to Brian. I looked into his eyes and they were haunted with pain.

"Let's go and get him before the fucker has any time to do anything to him," I whispered into his ear. He looked at me and gave me a small smile before breaking out into a sprint. Me, Mikey, Ben, Em and Ted weren't far behind him.

BPOV

I felt empty. We had treated him like shit and yet he was suffering for me. I felt like crying, and it was only then that I noticed that I already was. I saw Hunter, Ben and Mikey hug each other and Emmett sob on Ted's shoulder, but none of it registered. Then I heard Hunter's voice

"Let's go get him before the fucker has any time to do anything to him"

I looked at him and gave him and appreciative smile before getting up and fucking legging it out of the door.

Chapter two will be coming up shortly – will they be in time to save Justin or not?

Reviews please!


	2. Chapter 2

Hi guys here's the second chapter. Thank you for all the reviews I really appreciate it.

BPOV

It didn't really register that I was running, well more sprinting as fast as my legs would carry me. It barely took me five minutes to run to the building where Sunshine and Ian lived. I wasn't aware of the fact that I was taking the stairs two at a time.

I banged on the door and there was no answer, I didn't wait, couldn't wait any longer and so rammed the door open. I shouted for Justin and there was nothing. My heart fell and I screamed for Justin again. There was a weak little whimper from behind the door leading to the bedroom and I rushed over to it. What I saw will haunt me for the rest of my days. Justin was lying there, bleeding and bruised, his breathing was shallow and he looked like he had lost about 5 stone. I walked over to him slowly and lowered myself to his level.

"Sunshine?" I asked in a shaky voice

He just lay there, looking at the ceiling. I took his hand with one of my own and stroked his hair with my other. He turned his head towards me and I saw that his eyes, which were once so full of joy and Sunshine, were dead and full of tears.

"Bri- Brian?" he whispered, "I'm so sorry; I didn't want to hurt you, only protect you. I didn't mean to let any of you down," he said weakly.

More tears ran down my face and I cupped his cheek. I couldn't believe that after doing all of this to keep me safe, he was apologising.

"Shh, baby, you'll be fine, please, you have to be okay I can't lose you, not now." I begged when I saw his eyes drooping.

I was now sobbing onto his stomach and I didn't even hear when the rest of them entered the room. I looked at Sunshine, who was just barely hanging on and I rubbed my cheek on his hand.

"I love you," I whispered

MPOV

I ran after Brian and saw the room that he had entered. I looked in the drawer that Justin had said the tapes would be in. I needed to uphold his wishes, if only to make myself feel that little less guilty. We ransacked the apartment trying to find any other evidence of Justin's attack.

I heard Brian sobbing and I immediately thought of the worst. My stomach dropped and I felt all the blood rush in my ears. I felt numb as I walked to the room that held Brian and Justin.

"I love you," I heard Brian whisper brokenly.

It broke my heart to hear him talk like that. I really thought that Justin had left us and began to cry myself. Then I heard a miracle.

"I – love – you – too," It was said in-between gasps.

"Sunshine, you have to stay awake, please stay awake, come on baby, stay with me." I saw Brian interact with Justin, who was fighting for his life, and for the first time, I didn't feel jealous. I felt sad that this could be their last meeting.

"The ambulance is on its way," I heard Ben say from behind me. I nodded and I went round to the other side of Justin

"Justin... no...Sunshine, you have to stay here, you have so many people who would miss you, please" I heard myself say.

I think all of our hearts broke that little bit more when he didn't respond. I chanced a look at Brian and I wish that I hadn't. His eyes were so full of pain that I could hardly bear to watch them. He held one of sunshine's hands in his and stroked his hair with his other, whispering the sweetest and most loving words any of us had ever heard him say.

"Sunshine, I know that I wasn't the best person to you, I know that I always say that sorry is bullshit, but not this time. This time, sorry doesn't begin to cover how I feel. I can't lose you now, not when I've just discovered that I can't live without you. Please sunshine; please hang on for me, because if you die, I'll never be able to forgive myself. You are my lifeline and I realise now that I am yours, I promise that if you get through this, we will try for a monogamous relationship, I will treat you how you deserve to be treated; like a prince."

I was shocked, I knew that Brian loved Justin, but I never knew it was this much. I absently stroked the back of his hand with my thumb and looked at his pale face. He was beautiful; he was the younger brother that I always wanted. I loved him. So did Hunter, so did Ben. Love didn't cover what Brian felt for him. Brian adored him, and now he has only just realised it, he's going to lose him. The world is so fucking unfair.

BePOV

I watched Michael rub Justin's hand from the doorway. Hunter had joined Michael and Brian. I so wanted to join them, but I had to listen for the ambulance.

"HELLO, PARAMEDICS!" I heard a voice shout up.

"UP HERE!" I shouted back.

I saw them come past me with a stretcher and necessary equipment and they immediately set to work on Justin. !0 minutes later and Brian had gone in the ambulance with Justin. Me Hunter and Michael had gone to fetch a car and follow them.

We found Brian sitting outside a room, his head was in his hands and his shoulders were shaking. He was rocking back and forth. Michael reached out to touch him, when suddenly a doctor came out.

"Which of you here is Brian Kinney?" he asked

Brian's head snapped up and he put his hand up.

"Mr Taylor has you listed as his POA; we need to know if he has any allergies." I looked at Brian and he pulled out his wallet. He produced a piece of paper. I'm assuming it's his list of allergies for Justin. He always used to carry one around when they were together, and it seemed he hadn't stopped now. The doctor nodded and went back into the room.

Brian sat down and stared at the floor. Michael sat next to him and told him to talk.

"I only have one thing to say, why is it that I only realise how much I need him when I'm about to lose him forever?" He asked in anguish. Michael, myself , Hunter and Brian all huddled up and waited for the news on whether Justin would live or ... I don't want to say it.

BPOV

_He'll be alright he'll be okay he has to be, he's my sunshine. He'll live, he strong please God don't take him from me please._

An hour later and the doctor re emerged from the room.

"Mr Kinney, Mr Taylor is..."

Please don't kill me. I promise to update sooner – school got in the way and so did someone slagging off my writing. Didn't exactly make me want to write after being told that I suck at it. Oh well. I got enough good reviews for me to continue. Please keep reviewing I love to hear what you think, and whether I should carry on the story at all.

EC


	3. Chapter 3

Hey peeps, thanks for all the reviews. Enjoy.

Still don't own QAF

BPOV

"Mr Kinney, Mr Taylor is..."

I shot up and paid full attention,

"Is he going to be alright?" I asked frantically.

"He is in a serious but stable condition. He is not yet conscious and we fear that he may still slip into a coma."

I felt the tears come back full force. I looked at Mikey and vaguely heard him ask if we could see him. The doctor nodded and walked away. I walked into the room and looked at the figure on the bed. He looked so small and fragile. There was a chair right next to his bed, so I took it up straight away. The feeling of helplessness was slowly taking me over and gnawing at my heart. I couldn't believe that the beautiful, confident and gentle boy that I had fallen in love with had been subjected to more traumas.

I gingerly took his hand, afraid that he may break if I handled him roughly. He was cold, too cold. Deathly cold. The only thing reminding me that he was still alive was the gentle beep of the heart monitor. He was wired up to so many different things; he looked like he was a component in a big machine. I reached out and stroked his pale cheek as gently as I could and all the while there was only one thing that I could think.

"Come back."

I felt the fresh tears well up in my eyes and for once I wasn't afraid of letting them fall. I gripped his hand and started to beg him to come back.

"Please, you can't leave, please hold on, come back to me."

MPOV

I stood by the wall, Ben's arm around me, my arm around Hunter. The world stood still as we waited for this man who was so important to all of us, wake up. He looked on the verge of death, but the doctor had said that he was stable. That was good, right?

My heart broke when I heard Brian beg Justin to wake up. I couldn't bear to see them like this. Brian put his head on the edge of Justin's bed and closed his eyes. We could see the tear tracks on his face. I felt helpless.

I suddenly remembered that Jennifer didn't know about this.

"Ben we need to call my mom and Jennifer," I said to him. He nodded and told Hunter to stay with Brian while we went to phone our moms.

We left the room reluctantly and walked in the direction of a pay phone. This was not a conversation that I was looking forward to having.

Ben picked up the receiver and dialled Jennifer's number.

"Hello, Jennifer, you need to get down to the hospital now. Justin is in here. We'll tell you when you get here. Okay, bye"

I then dialled my mom's number.

"Mom, we found him," I said quietly

"Michael, is he okay?" she said

"He's in hospital, you should come down here."

"Okay baby, I'm on my way," she said, clearly worried

We walked back to the room and told Brian that my mom and Jen were coming. He just nodded and closed his eyes again. The only thing that I could do was pray that Justin made it through this, because if we lost Justin, soon after we would lose Brian too.

Sorry that it's only a short chapter after such a long time, but i have major writer's block, everything i write doesn't feel or sound right. As always... reviews please!

EC


	4. Chapter 4

New chapter, Enjoy – still don't own QAF

BPOV

I was holding onto Justin's hand like it was my lifeline. I couldn't let go even if I wanted to, because if I let go of his hand then he wasn't here anymore, he wasn't Justin, he was just an empty shell. I was oblivious as to what was happening around me as my full attention had been gained by Justin. For a while I held the illusion that my sunshine was just sleeping, but one look at all the wired that he was connected to shattered that dream very quickly. I needed him to wake up, to be my sunshine again. Remembering that coma patients can hear you, I began to proclaim my love the only way I knew I could.

"you are my sunshine, My only sunshine you make me happy when skies are grey you'll never know dear how much I love you please don't take my sunshine away"

"Don't leave me sunshine,"

Michael and Ben came back into the room sometime. They told me that I should leave and get cleaned up. Initially I refused, but after Jennifer and Debbie got here, I decided to give them some space.

Reaching across the bed, I leant down and kissed Justin, then swiftly left the room.

DPOV

After Brian left the room, we figured that we should get some answers from the doctor. He said that Sunshine was in a serious but stable condition, but still had a risk of slipping into a coma. Jen broke down not long after. This was the second time that we had been waiting to hear whether sunshine would make it or not. This wasn't fair, sunshine was so sweet, and we can't even blame this one on homophobia. This one was just from a pure psycho. None of us knew what to do. If Justin died, we would never be the same again. And Brian. Brian would close up forever; never let another person touch his heart, that's if he didn't try to join Justin. Things were not looking good and the whole time I felt sick to my stomach just waiting for our sunshine to wake up. There was nothing that we could do, and we were powerless to stop him from getting worse. I felt like a person standing directly in front of a tsunami, I would just get washed away by something powerful, without any control on where or how I ended up. I could only hope that they caught the bastard who did this.

ETHANPOV

I couldn't believe it when I got home, my apartment was trashed and my toy had gone. Someone had stolen him, He was MINE! Mine to play with. It was fun watching him try to get through his day. My mummy always said that if something that belonged to you was stolen, you should get it back. I looked at the picture I had taken of my toy and saw the pretty patterns that the blood made on his chest; he had never looked so beautiful, like a tribal sacrifice. I had to get back what was mine. He was my personal property and I wanted him back.

I called a cab and went to the hospital where I thought that they had taken him. I overheard the receptionist say

"Justin Taylor, room 305,"

I grinned and practically skipped to the floor; I rounded the corner and saw that they were all outside his room. NO! They would not stop me from getting back what was mine, they would not. I smiled again when they left to follow a doctor. I went into the room and frowned.

This wasn't my toy, my toy was decorated with pretty colours, not white bandages, this was all wrong. Not right. They would never let me take him. I smiled again, if I couldn't have him, no one could. I was giggling as I rounded the bed and unplugged the ventilator. He was so pretty as he thrashed about, and when the life left him slowly. It was like when you are a kid and you find it fun to pull the wings off flies. Just then the heart monitor set off a loud continuous beep. He flat lined. I bent down to kiss him, just as I heard the door open.

"Goodbye," I whispered

"ETHAN!" one of them shouted.

Time to make my exit.

MPOV

We had just finished speaking with the doctor, when we heard the heart monitor from Justin's room bleep at us. Mt blood froze at the sound and we all rushed to his room. Mom opened the door and screamed the one word that I never wanted to hear

"ETHAN"

Oooh, I just read that back and realised how creepy Ethan sounds, I didn't mean to make him that psychotic, but it really worked though. Again, sorry for the shortie, but my brother has recently been in hospital so I've been a bit preoccupied with that. If I get enough reviews I will continue, otherwise I won't bother so please hit the review button.


	5. Chapter 5

Hey guys, sorry I've been taking so long, but at the moment GCSEs rule my life. I still don't own QAF.

* * *

MPOV

"ETHAN!"

I just saw him jump from the window when i entered; there were nurses behind me trying to resuscitate Justin. My heart was slowly shattering, i couldn't take much more of this, Justin was my brother and it seemed as if the whole universe wanted him dead. It was just one near death after another; I know for a fact that if Justin died, Brian would follow.

Finally his heart started a steady rhythm again. I heard everyone either start to cry of heave a sigh of relief. It was just then that Brian returned from wherever it was that he went. He took one look at all of us and demanded answers. None of us were looking forward to telling him that Ethan had tried to kill him again. In the end it was Mom that told him, and after the story had been told i wished that he didn't have to know.

"He won't stop will he?" He asked.

I had never heard Brian sound that vulnerable or broken in my life. Not even when his dad abused him. I walked over to him and kissed him, his arms came round my waist and his head dropped to my shoulder.

"I don't think he will, but we won't let him achieve his goal, Justin will never be left alone." I assured him in a firm voice.

Brian just nodded into my shoulder. I saw out of the corner of my eye, the others nodding.

JUSTINPOV

I couldn't see anything; there was nothing but darkness around me. I felt totally and completely alone. There was no one around me; there was nothing but black. I wanted Brian; I wanted his strong arms around me. I wanted him to kiss my neck and stroke my hair, like he did after i was bashed.

Suddenly i heard voices, they were muffled

"I'm not leaving him again, i can't leave him again, God, Mikey, I'm so fucking scared for him."

I knew that voice, i definitely knew that voice. It was different though, he sounded broken. He? I knew that voice. I tried to remember who the voice belonged to. I could help but think that that voice didn't sound right, broken.

"Shh Bri, we'll get him back, he's strong, he'll make it."

I heard another voice soothe him... wait... BRIAN! He was here. Brian sounded broken. Brian sounded broken because of me. Brian sounded broken because i was here. I couldn't bear it. I struggled to open my eyes. I wanted to look at the love of my life, needed to look at the love of my life. However, my body had other plans, the more i tried to open my eyes, the more exhausted i became. I was becoming irritated; i just wanted to let my beautiful Brian know that i was okay. I tuned in to what was going on around me. I heard, heavy breathing and someone clearing their throat. Brian did that when he was trying to stop himself from crying. Was that noise coming from Brian? Was he crying because i was in here? Never more had i wanted to open my eyes as i did now. He needed to see that i was okay.

I refused to give up, i kept trying until exhaustion won out and i knew no more as i slipped into the oblivion that was sleep.

BPOV

I was close to tears, i knew it. But no one else did though. Justin was the only one who knew when i was close to tears. Suddenly a memory hit me.

Flashback

My mom just left, Justin and me were standing in the loft. What a come down from six rounds of mind blowing sex. My mother coming and finding out that i was gay. She had said that i was going to hell (A/N i don't remember what she actually said, so I'll just make it up) she said that i was wrong. I don't usually give a shit about what anyone says about me. But it fucking hurts when it comes from your own mother. I felt embarrassingly close to tears.

Justin broke me out of my reverie by putting his arms around my waist. He led me to the bed and whispered into my ear.

"It's okay Brian, you don't always have to keep up the tough guy act, let it all out."

The flood gate had opened then and i told him everything, even the things i hadn't told Mikey. I told him about the abuse that my old man had given me and how he had wanted my mother to have an abortion, but she refused. He just listened to me and rubbed my back. No one had ever comforted me like this, it was nice. I felt loved. I loved him too; i just didn't know how to say it. I knew he wanted me to say it, but he never pushed. For that, i was grateful

End flashback

I stood there in the hospital room, with Michael's arms around me, wishing they were Justin's. I couldn't cry. Not in front of these people, they counted on me for strength. I just hoped i could keep it together long enough to see Justin wake up. I did need him and i did love him. I was ready to tell him, i just wanted him to be awake to hear it.

I took comfort in the steady beep of the heart monitor that told me that he was still alive, still here with me. I felt like abandoning my "tough guy act" as Justin called it and just curling up on the bed with him, pretending that he was just asleep.

I needed him to wake up. As if he had heard my thoughts, i looked down and meeting my gaze were a pair of beautiful blue eyes

* * *

Again, sorry it took so long. Hope you like it. This chapter was a bit of a filler, there will be fluff and more from Ethan in the next chapter.

Reviews please

EC


	6. Chapter 6

Wow I can't believe its been almost two years to the day that I last updated this fic. If you are still reading this, thank you so much for sticking with it, and I'm so sorry this has taken so long. I still don't own qaf sadly

EC

BPOV

Justin's eyes opened, They actually opened. I can't believe it. There is such immeasurable relief coursing through my body that I feel higher than any drug has ever taken me. He's awake. Oh my god, he's awake, what do I say to him, how do I make him see that I love him so completely that I can't function if he's not with me. I realise that I'm just staring at him, but at this moment, I don't care, My eyes drinking in the sight of my sunshine, lying there awake, and looking at me with those beautiful ocean blue eyes.

"Justin!" is all I manage before I collapse at his side, grasping hold of his hand, so thin it is like old paper, easily torn if not handled with care. I feel his thumb stroking the back of my hand in circles reassuringly.

"Brian?" he whispers and I look up at his face once more, "What are you doing here?" He looks so confused, I don't think he knows were "here" is, but nonetheless, He's awake!

"Oh sunshine, there is nowhere I would rather be, you scared me so much. You're safe now Justin, Ethan can't get you any more. You are safe with me. I love you." I say, barely hanging on to the tears that are trying so hard to fall.

I lose the battle with my tears as he looks at me with such surprise at my declaration of love. They fall freely down my cheeks leaving salty tracks as evidence of my grief. I need him to believe me, so desperately need him to see that there is no one on this earth that I love more than him.

"You... love me?" he gasps.

I can't stand it any more, I bend down and capture his lips in the sweetest kiss of my life. I pour my love, grief, worry, and devotion to him into that kiss. I give him my soul freely, hoping that he will never give it me back. I can taste the dirt, grime, sweat and blood that is on his lips, but it is still perfect. I'm kissing my sunshine, I'm home

Justin POV

Brian is kissing me. That's all my drug addled brain can comprehend, Brian Kinney is kissing me. He's telling me that he loves me, Showing me that he loves me. I take a moment to truly appreciate what is happening, and not for the first time, I'm glad that while Ethan broke my body, he came no where near to breaking my mind.

The kiss ends and I look at Brian with such wonder, I never knew he felt that way about me, I almost can't believe it, but the tears on Brian's face were watery salty proof, He loves me. My mind comes into perfect clarity and I realise that I am in a hospital room, in a bed, and covered in bandages.

_Never mind that, tell him you love him back! _My brain screams at me

I tentatively, and with considerable effort, lift my hand to cup his cheek. He turns into my palm and presses a kiss to it. His eyes slipping shut seemingly of their own accord. He looks so blissful, I am almost loathed to make him open his eyes, but I need to see directly into his soul as I tell him the three most important words ever invented.

"Brian, open your eyes," I say, my voice gradually getting stronger, "I love you too," I say as my thumb drifts over to his lips, the pad ghosting over the soft flesh, needing him t feel the truth of my words.

He smiles, and closes his eyes again, and I notice a tear escape his eye. I move my fingers clumsily away from his cheek in order to brush it away, and as my hand breaks contact with his skin, his eyes fly open. He grabs hold of my fingers and presses my hand back to his cheek rubbing his face against my skin

"Please, for a while, don't stop touching me," He whispers in a voice so small, its hard to believe it came from the Brian Kinney we all know.

But then I remember, his tough guy act is exactly that, an act. This was the real Brian Kinney, A vulnerable scared little boy who needed as much love as possible, hidden underneath years of porcelain walls built to protect against the hurt thrown at him day after day. I remember that every time he was with me, the porcelain would crack and I would catch a glimpse of the real Brian, the one who needed to be loved, and cared for. A little ironic, considering I'm the one in hospital after being abused by my so called boyfriend.

I remember the first time Ethan hit me, I was so scared. But then I thought of why I was putting up with this shit, to save the love of my life. That thought gave me courage. Courage enough to think that I had already been in a position where I was scared of my own shadow, and there was no way that this stupid little boy was going to make me feel that way. I think that is the only way I can say I'm glad I was bashed. It taught me that I can get through anything if I believe I can.

I feel a head on my chest and look down to see Brian had rested there. He looked up at me and smiled slightly

"I'm not hurting you am I?" He asks tentatively.

"No, I think you found the one bit of skin left in this Justin shaped bruise," I say, Joking about is easier than crying, I tell myself.

I suddenly feel drained, and can feel my eyelids start to droop. It is like they are made of lead, I can't control it. I can feel a pair of lips on my forehead and a gentle voice whispering in me ear as I once more slip into the calming blackness of oblivion.

BPOV

"Sleep well Sunshine," I whisper as I kiss his forehead

I get up and leave the room, to see all the family waiting outside. I tell them that he woke up, and that he is now resting. It warms my heart to see all the smiles of relief, each member of the family wore when they heard Justin was okay. Just for a second we all believed that everything would be okay, and that this nightmare was over.

That illusion was shattered by eight words spoken by the doctor holding a folder;

"Mr Kinney, Could I talk to you for a second, please."

TBC

Well there it is, the first chapter in two years. I hope it makes sense because I'll be honest I haven't got a clue what has happened in the story so far, I haven't re read it. I promise I will update more often, now that I am back on board with writing my stories. Thank you all so much

Oh yeah, if you notice that some letters are missing out of words, its because my nephew decided to give my laptop a drink of coca cola, jamming most of the keys on my keyboard.

EC


End file.
